Elusive Solitude
When was the last time you intentionally spent quality time with yourself?
Hopefully, it was last night as you made grand plans for the future. But if it wasn’t. . . . .
A word you don’t hear much is “solitude.” Maybe that’s because it is very rare these days. When prisoners are placed in solitary confinement, they may go a little crazy, or they may use the time to grow. Too much solitude feels like punishment, but some is essential if we are going to grow.
We are surrounded at work, at home and everywhere else, but it is solitude we need for reflective introspection. Even when we are alone, technology and social networking stake their claims in our already-crowded minds.
One reason carpooling hasn’t worked well is because solitary driving time is precious to so many of us. Many busy people, who can afford it, hire drivers because their time alone in the car is rare and invaluable.
Tomorrow, observe the number of people talking on cell phones while driving, dining, shopping, etc. Look around to find someone sitting quietly doing nothing. Can you find them?
Therapists agree that patients make headway primarily because therapy provides time, structure, and accountability to focus inward.
If you want to grow and move forward, take time every so often to be alone. Build it into your schedule to make sure it happens. Use it to think about where you are and where you want to go, and to problem solve, reflect, and re-connect with your heart’s desires and challenges. You know how good you are when you are stress-free, focused, and self-empowered.
I’ve got a friend in Scottsdale who is a managing partner in a successful company. He is a different guy when he gets too busy to take his regular hike up Pinnacle Peak or even shoot baskets for an hour in his driveway. This is his solitude. – His focus and peace of mind depend on it.
What is your source of solitude and balance?
How well do you nurture it? Do you show proper gratitude for its gift? Most of us could do better.
Note: Do not steal time from those who love you. Learn to identify abusers, and reduce time spent with those who have little or no relevant purpose relational to your life’s vision. Give yourself permission to make better choices with your time. Once precious moments are spent, they are gone forever.
Michael Christman
Magis – The Achievement Company
You cannot do a kindness too soon, for you never know how soon it will be too late.
— Ralph Waldo Emerson